When Granny wasn't knitting!

When granny wasn't knitting, she worked as a spy! I know, I know I have a bit of a hard time believing it to. What you don’t know is that she is the number one spy for MI6. I mean who would believe a nutty, frail, old lady could be an undercover operative of such prowess.

She has stopped Baroness Europa from trying to assassinate Barton John and Charles Windpipe from stealing the throne. She is the number one spy in the world, and I am lucky enough to call her Granny. Though, I have to say, the day I found out what she was, not her best moment!

We travelled to London as my parents were away, she had won us tickets for our favourite band at a famous concert hall. We were staying at famous hotel chain in Park Lane, and it was stunning.

On arrival she started arguing with the concierge about his rough handling of her bags and that if she wanted the hotel to see her drawers, she’d be parading herself around in them. Then while getting her keys she began to comment on some of the jewellery.

“Well, that’s clearly a fake!” She said loudly looking at a woman showing off her jewellery, “you can see its chipped! That one there with the big gold signet ring is overcompensating for something.” She chuckled to herself as the man stared daggers at her. “I hope the room is on the top floor so I can get a better view of the nutters in the Serpentine”.

Most of the people in the foyer were laughing quite violently except for the manager who she commented, “Looked like a sour prune!” And of course, the overcompensating man.

I adore and love my Granny but at this point I moved her to the lift and set us on our journey to the seclusion of the lift as laughter sang like a church chorus though the ground floor.

“I wonder why they’re laughing?” Granny winked at me.

When we got to the lift, the lift operator asked for the floor and pressed the button and the doors closed and we started to rise.

“Well, that was fun! I bet the manger could cook eggs on his forehead after that show.”

The three of them burst into rolls of laughter and Granny tipped the lift operator handsomely as they left.

Cursed by love!

In Germany, 1885, the first automobile was created. It was a mechanical marvel and it was credited to Karl Benz, a genius and intellectual god some say. There is some truth I suppose, the car was created by an intellectual god but it was bestowed to the human as a gift, but with many stories about god’s giving gifts, one should err on the side of caution.

The idea came to him in dreams, after seeing plans created by the inventor Leonardo Di Vinci the Italian designer. His designs revolutionised travel many years later, but they were to be a curse for humanity created through jealousy and hate.

Karl was a poor child, but he was incredibly determined to make something of his life and having wit and genius he strove for something more. From the moment he was born he drew the attention of one god for his mechanical mind and so he was gifted the stimuli to engineer fantastic inventions.

He grew up and went to University, later creating the finest vehicle known to man, a wonder of the modern world. It would have been wonderful if Hephaestus had not discovered what had brought Benz into the world.

You see Aphrodite had one of her many affairs with a mortal and it led to the birth of a child who Aphrodite absolutely loved. After birthing him she switched him with a mortal who died tragically in an explosion. Aphrodite feigned mourning knowing that her husband had caused the explosion to rid the world of another one of her illegitimate children.

He marveled in knowing he had hurt her as shed hurt him and she had left the boy alone to give him a chance bestowing gifts that she hoped Hephaestus would covet and protect. In secret they both showered the boy with love as he grew and bestowed gifts only gods could grant.

Unfortunately, a mother can never give up her child fully and when she told the truth Hephaestus flew into a rage. He could not switch his love for the boy of and wanted to continue to be his benefactor, but he had to do something to the human world that once again caused him pain.

The curse was made, the boy would be successful, and his invention would hold a place in time, but it would cause death, pain, disease and poison the world that accepted it as a gift. The boy would be loved in his own time, but he would be a victim of his mother’s cheating ways and in the future his name would be a blemish on human history.